He Speaks in our Sorrow

"As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, And at the last He will take His stand on the earth, “Even after my skin is destroyed, Yet from my flesh I shall see God; Whom I myself shall behold, And whom my eyes will see and not another. My heart faints within me!" Job 19: 25-27

Recently, I found myself reflecting on a verse that made me wonder: How did Job know? Although I don't fully understand how the concept of the Redeemer was revealed to him, I am certain that Job had hope in what he believed about Jesus. Even amid immense sorrow and suffering, Job found hope in the knowledge that his Redeemer lives and that one day he would see God. His hope was anchored in Jesus, who had yet to come. Job had a relationship with God, and the Spirit of God had revealed the truth about a Redeemer to his spirit. 

In the face of great loss, pain, and sorrow, Job found comfort in the belief that although his skin would decay, his flesh would one day see God. We, too, share that same hope. No matter what challenges we encounter today or how deep our pain may feel, we can find solace in the knowledge that our Redeemer lives. Jesus came to Earth, died for us, and now He lives; one day, He will return for His bride.

Just as God gave Job hope in his sorrow, He also provides us with hope. We have hope that our Redeemer lives, hope that He will return, and hope that even though pain and sorrow may accompany us, one day we will see God. On that day, there will be no more pain or sorrow.

How did Job maintain hope in the face of overwhelming sorrow? He looked to the promises of God. He chose to believe and to praise the promise of his Redeemer. I pray that as we face our own losses and pain, we too will focus on what has been promised. I pray we will choose to give praise because we KNOW our Redeemer lives!

Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though our outer man is decaying, our inner man is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we focus not on what is seen, but on what is not seen; for the things that are seen are temporary, while the things that are not seen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:16-17)

 

Linking up with Me, Coffee and Jesus plus….

Being Thankful In All Things

 

Recently I was asked "How can we give thanks for everything that happens to us?" My quick answer was, "We can't. And God doesn't expect us to. God said that we are to give thank in everything, not for everything."

So often the enemy changes one small word and our entire thinking goes wrong. God tells us that we are to be thankful in our circumstances not for them. 

How many times have we been in a place where we are faced with suffering, pain, or trials with the wrong view? We think that somehow we are to be thankful for whatever we are facing. In this life we can face some really hard things in life. Like, how can a mother watch her child die of cancer and be thankful? How can a wife be thankful that her husband is having an affair? How can we be thankful as we live and work in an environment that seems hostile to what we believe? How can anyone be thankful for being abused, beaten, abandoned, marginalized, forgotten or... the list could go on and on.

Oh dear one, God does not ask us to be thankful for these things. He wants us to have an attitude of thankfulness as we walk through them. When our circumstances threaten to overwhelm us we can still be thankful. We can be thankful as we look to God. But first we must take our eyes off the circumstance, die to what we thought would happen, and remember who He is and what He has done. We can be thankful for His continued Faithfulness to us.

We can give thanks because we know that God always acts in righteousness. "I will give thanks to the LORD according to His righteousness And will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High". Ps 7:17 

We can give thanks because He is our God! "You are my God, and I give thanks to You; You are my God, I extol You". Ps 118:28

We can give thanks as a sacrifice of praise. "...The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21

God wants us to choose an attitude of thankfulness.  It’s choosing to live, walk, and believe in TRUTH regardless of emotions or circumstances. Living a life in thankfulness is beyond the ability of the flesh so we must rely on the Spirit. We must be in His word. "Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving." Col 4:2 

Will you choose to be thankful because of who God is? Will you choose to focus on God and His character instead of whatever current circumstances you find yourself in? Go to God in prayer and ask His Spirit to help you live a life being thankful reguardless of your circumstances.

Stop Fighting For Control

Have you ever had one of those days when it feels like you are carrying around the weight of the world? You look around you and see all the pain, heartbreak, struggling, confusion, uncertainty and you want to do something. You want to try fix it!

 

There is so much hurt. So much pain. You wonder, "How can I help make it better"? As you look around it seems overwhelming. How can you help those that will not listen? How can you warn of the coming storms when people choose not to see? How can you encourage the heartbroken? The abused? Those caught in sin's cycle?

In the midst of a day when I am taking on the sorrow of the world God whispers gently in my ear. “These sorrows are not for you. I will carry them.”

I protest, “But God, shouldn’t I say SOMETHING to help them see truth?” Shouldn’t I DO something?” Again a whisper, “Dear child, you have spoken. You have pointed out truth.  You have loved them where they are. And as I give you opportunity continue but for right now, let it go and pray.”

 

“PRAY? That is it!” “Yes.”

Oh how often I forget that God carries the world and all the troubles on His shoulders I do not need to. I forget I am not in control of the lives of those I love. God changes minds, heart and saves souls. He convicts of sin and He is the one who will work it all out for His glory. 

I need to pray.

What I continue to learn over and over and over is, I AM NOT IN CONTROL. Not even a little. I am learning, continually it seems, that I need to trust more. For if I am fighting to control my family, friends or my circumstances then I am not trusting God. Did you get that?

If I am fighting for control, then I am not trusting God. 

 

Oh Father help me trust you more fully! Help me to realize that I can not carry the sorrows and heartaches of this world. You have called me to pray. Father, teach me to pray and leave it all with you.

#trustgod #blogger #devotions #newblogpost #itsbeenawhile.

It Is Well

Horatio Spafford wrote the hymn “It Is Well With my Soul” during a difficult season of life. He lost his only son to sickness. A successful lawyer he lost all he owned in the The Great Chicago fire. And shortly afterwards he lost his four daughters when the ship his daughters and wife were on went down. He penned this hymn as he was sailing to meet his wife while they passed over the area his daughters had drowned. 

In the midst of horrible devastation Stafford chose to remind himself that nothing mattered but Christ. Whether life was good or difficult he would say, “ it is well with my soul”. 

This is the kind of peace I desire. A peace that springs forth from a knowledge that God is sovereign and He is always good. Stafford could not have penned the words to this hymn without that knowledge. He could not have felt peace without complete trust in His God. 

Oh Father, build this kind of trust in my heart that I can say, no matter what may come, “it is well, it’s is well with my soul.”

The Hope in Suffering

I was reading in 1 Peter today and was struck again by the hope we have in our suffering. The context of 1 Peter is our suffering for the Lord, especially during the last days. But as I read it today I was reminded that the truths Peter shares and how they also apply to our everday suffering.

1 Peter 1:6 and 7 says "In this you greatly rejoice, even thought now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by faire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;"

In what are we to rejoice? We have a living hope through Jesus Christ. We will obtain an inheritance which is imperishable. We are protected by the power of God through faith. (1:3-5) And because we have a living Christ who has secured our place in heaven we can rejoice today, even though we face suffering. Suffering is temporary, our salvation, our inheritance is eternal.

Therefore, by focusing on the eternal in the day to day trials I can persevere knowing that one day, even if not here on earth, Christ will restore, confirm, strengthen and establish, not only His kingdom but also His child.

Today I hold on to my eternal reward. I hold on knowing that one day the suffering and trials of this life will fade away. I will no longer feel pain, sorrow or heartbreak. One day in heaven I will see Jesus face to face and all of this world will mean nothing.

Is God Still Faithful When the Storm Doesn't End?

The LORD is good to all, And His mercies are over all His works. Psalm 145:9

I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD In the land of the living. Psalm 27:13

Recently I have heard several proclaim God's faithful as a result of answered prayer. They praised God because He provided a job, healing for illnesses, and the return of a prodigal child. Those around them rejoiced and exclaimed the goodness and faithfulness of God, as we should. God is good. He is faithful and together we can rejoice when we see clear evidence of His goodness and grace to us.

But as I sat there a question came to my mind. I am not exactly sure where it came from and I do not believe the question was meant to be asked aloud at that particular time. But it was question that my own heart needed to answer. The question my heart asked was, "Is God faithful and good even when things do not turn out the way I expect?" My immediate response was "Of course He is! God is always good. He is always faithful. Even in those times I don't see His answers or understand what He is doing."

 The question haunted me. I was not satisfied with my quick heart response. Would God still be faithful if a sick child died after much prayers? Would God still be faithful if your husband chose to walk out of your marriage after praying and fighting for healing? Would God still be faithful if your child remained a prodigal even though many were praying for her?

Would I still see God as faithful if I had to walk the rest of my life in pain, never to be healed? Could I walk through whatever I am walking through, without any apparent answers, and still proclaim God good? 

The truth is there are days I struggle believing He is good to me. I struggle to believe in His faithfulness.

It's easy to proclaim God's goodness when things turn out the way we think they should. It's easy to give thanks when God answers our prayers with a yes, or answers beyond what we asked or imagined. But when His answer is no it can be harder to see and trust in His goodness.

I am learning that I need to know and understand that God's faithfulness is a part of His character. His goodness is not based on what He does and doesn't do according to my plan, it's who He is. God is faithful according to His plans, not mine. I may not see the end of a particular season of suffering but I can trust in God's goodness to see me through.

The thing is, regardless of how I might feel God remains the same. God is good. God is faithful. There is nothing that can change those facts. If I feel that He isn't good or faithful in my life, whatever the circumstance, then I have a wrong view of God and I am believing lies. Nothing can or will change who God is.

We speak of God's faithfulness while we walk through the storms of life but can we speak of His faithfulness if the storm doesn't end? I want to be more mindful to sing His praises in the storm, not just when the storm is over. 

When We Feel Shriveled Up By Suffering

Though I have become like a wineskin in the smoke, I do not forget Your statutes. Ps 119:83

I have always loved Psalm 119 and as a result have spent much time reading and studying it. This chapter has brought sweet comfort and refreshment to my soul on many occasions. But it never fails that a fresh reading of it will bring something new that I hadn't seen before. Today, while reading I stopped at verse 83 and thought so what happens to a wineskin in smoke? What does the psalmist mean by saying that he has "become like a wineskin in smoke"? 

Here is what I found:

The KJV uses bottle instead of wineskin and has this to say, "As the bottles in the East are made of skin, it is evident that one of these hung up in the smoke must soon be parched, shriveled up, lose all its strength, and become unsightly and useless. Thus the Psalmist appeared to himself to have become useless and despicable, through and exhausted state of his body and mind, by long bodily afflictions and mental distress." (1)

As I read this I couldn't help but remember those times in my life that I too have felt parched, shriveled up, weak and useless. For a variety of reasons, whether it's illness, pain, tragedy, sorrow, or any number of difficult circumstances, the journey of this life can seem to leave us withered and worn. These times can come as a result of God's discipline. It is true that God disciplines us for good and our suffering comes in order to produce endurance and character (Romans 5:3-5). But it doesn't always seem like it's for our good and we feel as if we are being dried up. 

So it's in the midst of feeling dried up and useless that we can say, "even though I feel like I am being shriveled up and weak I will not forget Your word. I will not forget your truth." I love Keble's paraphrase, "The severity of the discipline does not alienate me from thee, or cause me to depart from thy Law."  And then there is Matthew Poole's Commentary which says, "My natural moisture is dried and burnt up; I am withered and deformed, and despised; and my case grows worse and worse..." (2) but I do not forget Your word.  

Today regardless of where we are in this journey may we remember that our strength comes from the truth of His word. May we be reminded that in His word we find comfort. No matter how "parched or shriveled" you may feel do not depart from what you know is true according the the Word of God.

(1) http://biblehub.com/psalms/119-83.htm

(2) http://biblehub.com/commentaries/psalms/119-83.htm



Joining these blog hops today...

Battle Weary

As you sit quietly fighting the tears you realize you've been here before. You have fought this battle, or at least you think you have. But you wonder, "If it was fought why am I here again?"

Your heart is weary of the battles that seem to take forever to fight. The battles that seem to overcome you. The battles that cause you to feel like you want to give up.

You do the only thing you know to do. You reach for His word. You open up the only weapon you have and begin to read...and pray. As you read you realize you do not fight alone. You feel His strength and His power flow through you.

 It's then you understand that the battle you are fighting is one that must be fought often. It must be fought often, not because you are weak, but because God wants to make you stronger. He wants to take you deeper. Deeper into the battle, deeper into the heart, so that you can come face to face with that which keeps you in bondage. He takes you deeper in order to see your sin, your weaknesses, idols and those things that you hold on to. He takes you deeper for greater healing, and a greater victory.

So when you find yourself fighting a battle that you thought had been fought do not be discouraged. God is taking you deeper into the battle in order to grow you. So fight the good fight, keep a hold of your faith in Christ Jesus and know that He fights for you.

For Further encouragement when you are in the midst of the battle: Deut 20:1; 2 Chron 20:17; 1 Tim 6:12; 2 Thess 3:13 1 Pe 1:13; James 1:12; Eph 6:11; Gal 6:9; Rev 2:10

God Sees My Affliction

I love to read the Psalms. It’s here that I best understand the reality of suffering. Many of us walk through hard, difficult things in life. Some have seasons of sufferings while others seem to live a life of chronic suffering. Suffering comes in many forms. We suffer through losses of loved ones, pregnancies, jobs, relationships and more. We suffer physically through chronic pain, illnesses and just growing older and our body not working like it used to. We suffer mentally, even though many don’t admit it, we suffer through depression, anxieties, and many other forms of mental illnesses. And we also suffer because of sin. We suffer because of our own sin and it’s consequences. We suffer because of other’s sin and being sinned against. The reality is, we all suffer.

Life on this earth is not easy, at least for the majority of people. David is a good reminder of this reality. David was chosen by God to be King. He had a heart that followed God. And yet, he still sinned and paid deeply for those sins. He was hated and chased down by his enemies, betrayed by one he thought was his friend. He felt abandoned both by people and at times God. David struggled with deep sadness and some might even say depression. His heart was grieved and broken, not just over his sin but over his life’s circumstances. He grew tired and weary from the constant battles of this life.

The last couple of days I’ve been in Psalm 30 and 31 and here are just a few samples of what David was feeling. He was near the pit of hell. (30:3,9) He cried and was in deep grief and sorrow. (30:5; 31:9) He felt weak, and a reproach to those around him. He was an object of dread, and felt forgotten, broken, lied about, terror, and feared for his life. (31:10-13) David, at least in my reading of this, was not in a good place. As I read these words today they brought such sweet encouragement because I knew then that God really did understand my times of deep sadness. God understands the season that I walk through mild depression and being fearful.

God sees me, just like he saw David.  And just like David I can choose to rejoice in the fact that God does see me. He may not remove that which I am currently facing, he may not remove my affliction but I can still choose to focus on the fact of who God is. (31:7-8)

David chose to believe and trust in the God he knew God to be. Instead of looking at his life and the enemy of this world and his flesh David choose to walk in the truth of a God that would deliver him. David’s response to suffering was remembering who God is. Oh how I needed this reminder too! It doesn’t matter how I feel or what painful experiences I am currently walking through, what does matter is whether or not I believe in who God says He is!

The whole of God’s word tells of who He is but just in Psalms 31 I am reminded today that He will deliver me. He hears me. He is my stronghold, my rock and fortress. He will lead me, guide me and keep me safe. He is my strength. He gives me grace. He is trustworthy. He is good and His loving kindness is mine. Wow, what amazing truth in that one chapter! Truth that we can hold on to and believe. Truth that gives hope. Truth that gives courage to face today and all the tomorrows no matter what may come.


I am so grateful for His words. I am grateful that God chose to include David’s life for us to read. I get David, I understand the soul the that cries out in deep sadness and yet chooses to believe and trust in the God he knows. Of course I often forget, I fail and get lost but when I return to God’s word He is so gracious to remind me of who He is and when I remember who He is my soul, once again find hope in the Lord.

Have You Lost Hope?

Have you lost hope? Are you growing weary of fighting to find hope in your circumstances? Too often we are looking to the wrong things or people. As I was reading Lamentations 3 this morning I was reminded that regardless of how I feel, regardless of my current circumstances, or how people treat me, I can still have hope. I can still walk with joy through my circumstances because I hope in what the Lord has promised.

In Lamentations 3 we see one who has lost hope. He is a man who has seen affliction(1) and feels as if his prayers are not heard.(8) He has no peace and has forgotten happiness. His strength has failed and he has lost hope. (17-18) Can you identify? Have you been so overwhelmed by your circumstances that you have lost hope?

If you find yourself in a place of lost hope then may I encourage you to remember that the Lord’s faithfulness will never cease toward those who seek Him. Lamentations continue with a reminder that we would also do well to remember. “This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope.” (21)

In the midst of feeling forgotten and losing hope we need to remember that “ The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, For His compassions never fail.They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. (22-23) God promises to remain faithful to His children. He will never fail or disappoint. We can have hope because God, and God alone, will never fail us.

God is our portion and because He is we can hope in Him. What this means is that even if we have lost all we have in this world, finances, family, friendships, comfort, or even my health, we can have hope that God is with us. We can be satisfied with nothing and rest knowing we have God.

 This attitude is hard and I am still working on it. To be content with God alone even if my family and friends forsake me? I’d rather be destitute, live in great physical pain and poor health than be forsaken by those I love. My greatest fear has always been to be abandoned by those I love. To come to the end of my life and realize I have no friends or family who care about me. Yet I am continually reminded that all the Lord has in mine and He is enough. I am reminded that the things (and people) of this world will disappoint but God never will. I am reminded that unless I put my hope in the Lord I will always live in a place of disappointment.

When our hope is in the Lord we are never disappointed.

“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “Therefore I have hope in Him.” The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, To the person who seeks Him. (Lam 3:24-25)

Why not spend time today reading Lamentations 3. Circle the word hope and write down all you see about hope. Who do we hope in? Why should we hope? What is the result of hope? I would love to have you come back and share what God has showed you.

Linking up at Grandma's Brief's Grand Social! Stop on in and visit other baby boomer bloggers.

His Goodness in Times of Trouble

There is much heartache and trouble in this world. It comes to us in so many forms and for many reasons. The bottom line is that we have troubles because sin entered the world long ago. Adam and Eve disobeyed God and since that time there has been all kinds of suffering. All of creation suffers and groans because of sin.

It is because of the sinfulness of man that wars are started. It is because of sin that spouses are not content and commit adultery. It is because of the sinful desires in our hearts that we hate, envy, murder, lie, steal, are unkind, lack compassion and are selfish. A sinful heart causes a man to hit his wife, a child to rebel against his parents and woman to abort her child. Because of sin we break our covenant and divorce our spouse. Because of sin there is all kinds of suffering in this world.

We have troubles because we do not obey God. We do not obey God because our heart is deceitfully wicked all the time. Our hearts desire what is wants, when it wants it regardless of what God has said is good.

So is there any hope? Is there hope for the believer of Christ? Of course there is hope! David, in Psalm 27, reminds us that we do not need to fear, we can be confident in the One who will rescue us. Yes we will be rescued from the  troubles on this earth one day when Christ returns, but I also believe that David is telling us that we can also see the goodness of the Lord today. We can have hope in the midst of troubles. We do not need to fear.

To have hope, to see God’s goodness in times of trouble we need to…

…seek Him. We need to worship God, meditate on His word and sing praises to Him. (Ps 27:4-6)
…pray. Cry out to the One who does not abandon you, to the One who promises to help you. (27:7-10)
…walk in humility. Be teachable through the Spirit of God. Submit to His word, to His will. (27:11)
…wait. If we seek Him, pray and are willing to submit to His will then we must wait for the Lord to show us what to do next. It is the strong heart, who seeks the face of God, that can humbly wait. (27:14)

Just to be clear though, we can seek God, pray, walk in humility, wait upon Him and still have troubles. We will still experience suffering, pain and evil in this land. The difference is that the one who seeks God will not be consumed by it. They will remain confident in the Lord, knowing that it is He who will lift us up out of the pit of suffering so that we see His goodness. (Psalms 31:19-24)

Are you in the midst of suffering right now? Does it seem that your whole world is falling apart? Why not spend some time reading Psalm 27 and Psalm 130. Cry out to God. Pour out your heart to Him. Worship Him today through His word in spite of your circumstances, regardless of the pain you are experiencing. He promises to answer the one who truly seeks His face. (Matt 7:7; Deut 4:29; Jer 24:7)

'Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. 'I will be found by you,' … (Jer 29:12-14a)

I am Afflicted and Needy

Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You; and let those who love Your salvation say continually, “Let God be magnified.” But I am afflicted and needy; Hasten to me, O God! You are my help and my deliverer; O Lord, do not delay. (Psalm 70:4-5)

I want to be self reliant, to not appear needy. For me to ask for help is difficult especially when it comes to emotional or spiritual help. Actually if I am really honest it’s just any kind of help. In 2005 I was in a car accident and there were those of my friends who wanted to provide a few meals afterwards. I said I was fine; I could manage. I was lying, I could manage, but it was difficult, I was in a lot of pain. In spite of what I said a few friends brought meals anyway. They just didn’t give me a choice. It was such a blessing.

Some may say it’s my pride, and perhaps it is, but somewhere along the line I got the message that needing the help of others was a bad thing. It shows weakness and I didn’t want to appear weak. I don’t want to “have” to need anyone. Most of my life has been lived with an attitude of “ I can do this, I don’t need your help”. Unfortunately this attitude carries over into my relationship with God. I’ve made choices without God because I “can do it” on my own. Yes, I know, pride with a capitol P!

But God, don’t you just love that phrase! BUT GOD! He is unwilling to just let me go. He knows what is best and while I may fight against Him at times He is patiently and lovingly teaching me of my absolute dependency on Him. He is showing me I do need His help and the way He helps us is by sometimes using others.

Since my accident I have lived with chronic pain and today I can rejoice for it. This pain has taught me of my need to rely on God. It has taught me humility. I am afflicted. I am needy. Neither of those are a sign of weakness. In fact they are quite the opposite. I have learned it takes strength to admit that we indeed are weak and in need of help.

Today I still struggle, at times, with asking others for help, but I am learning. However, I can freely admit before God that I am needy. I can not do this thing called life apart from His help. I need Him in every single moment of every single day. As I learn to rely on Him in the moments of life I am able to see in a greater way just how marvelous and wonderful His grace is poured out to me. In fact because I am relying on Him more and more each day I am able to see just how He uses our affliction and neediness to bring glory to Him.

You see, if I get up in the morning, barely able to walk and in great pain, yet do what I am suppose to do and serve those God places in front of me it is because He has given me the grace to do it. He is the one who gets the glory, not me. So while I have not yet arrived in full knowledge I have learned to say along with Paul, “… "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.” 2 Cor 12:9

It is a continued journey of learning, growing and walking in His grace. A grace that gives me what I need in each moment. A grace that strengthens me, His beloved daughter who is afflicted and needy.


Linking up with Grace & Truth and Counting My Blessings

Called to Forgive, Again!

Have you ever had one of those moments when you think you are over something, it's in the past, been forgiven and healing has come and then wham out of no where someone hits you with a baseball bat? That was my week. From out of no where someone hit me. I was completely unprepared. I am not sure why I was so stunned.

My past was filled with hurtful words and actions from this person. Some might say that I should have expected it. But the thing is I didn't expect it because healing in the relationship had come. I had forgiven and for a couple of years we've experienced a new relationship. We had reached a place of common ground, of walking in grace and forgiveness. Or so I thought.

Her words cut deep. They hurt, and as I took my hand and rubbed over the once healed scar expecting it to be open and bleeding again I found it was still healed. The wound was healed, but the feeling of the scar caused a deep ache within. I wanted this to be over. I didn't want to be reminded again of the past betrayals. The past hurt. To be honest, this hurt knocked me to the ground. For almost 2 days I sat there stunned trying to figure out why now. Why did I give her the power to hurt again? 

We all have those times don't we? Times we know healing has come or that we have moved past a hurt and yet find ourselves knocked to the ground. It's in that moment, with face to the ground, that we have a choice. 

A choice. What will I do now? Will I continue laying there on the ground wallowing in self pity and hurt? Or will I allow Jesus to pick me up? One thing I know for sure is that it has to be Jesus picking me up because left on my own I would sit and nurse those old wounds. I would feel sorry for myself. My flesh is often so weak and I want to hurt them back. I want revenge. But I know truth. I know what Jesus says about forgiveness. I know what He says about loving my enemies and those who hurt me. So I give it to Him. I offer up the hurt and ask Him to help me up. 

Looking at Jesus causes us to look at what HE has done not what has been done to us. When I look at Jesus I remember that I too am a sinner. I have hurt others with my words and by my actions. I have failed. I have fallen short. But He, Jesus, has forgiven me. His blood was shed so that I might walk in freedom of my sin. 

When I look at the cross of Jesus and see my sin that nailed Him there and the forgiveness that was given how can I not forgive again? How can I not offer forgiveness to this person again when ALL my sins have been forgiven? 

When I look at Jesus I can forgive again and continuing walking with love for my enemies and those who hurt me. 

Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. Matt 18:21-22

What Name Has God Given You?

The angel of the LORD appeared to him and said to him, "The LORD is with you, O valiant warrior." Judges 6:12

This morning I was reminded of a time when God spoke to me in order to remind me that He was with me. It wasn’t an audible voice. It wasn’t like the angel of the Lord appeared and spoke to me the way He did Gideon in Judges. But still, the words He spoke into my heart were truth none the less.

I was fairly new in our church and knew very few people. I had signed up for a bible study that was a pilot¹ study written by one of the women attending the church. Each week I would do my homework, come to the study and sit alone. I sat there heart broken, crying tears no one could see. My life had been ripped apart by current life circumstances. As my heart laid there, ripped open as God began to work. He began to expose long ago hurts and sorrow that I had tried hard to forget and push deep down in darkness. I didn’t know at the time just how much I needed this study. I needed to hear from God.

At the time I couldn’t have told you what I needed to hear but, like Gideon in Judges 6:13 I had often wondered where God was. It was a time in my life that I wasn’t sure God was with me. I had deep doubts that He was good or that He loved me. I knew He was a good God filled with love, but I wasn’t so sure that it included me.

It was in this state of mind that God spoke the words, “I am with you. You are Beloved of God.” They barely registered in my heart as my eyes read the words in Romans 9:25 "I WILL CALL THOSE WHO WERE NOT MY PEOPLE, 'MY PEOPLE,' AND HER WHO WAS NOT BELOVED, 'BELOVED.'"  Did God mean me? Was I beloved? Was I truly loved? Did He really see me as His beloved even when I was not beloved? These truths were new to my heart and as they began to settle into the depths of my doubt a small flicker of hope began to spring forth.

It would take a few more years and faithful people of God to walk beside me but I would embrace the truth of who I am.  I would see that my circumstances, past or present, do not have anything to do with God’s view of me. I would see that what I believe and feel are often not based on the truth of God’s word. But most of all I would see that before the foundations of the world ever came into being He knew me. I was fearfully and wonderfully created in His image.² I was created for Him. He knew all about my life before it ever came into existence and He called me beloved.

When the truth of all that began to grab hold of me my life changed. God whispered, “You are my Beloved daughter” on that day and all the days since. There are days I forget. Days I don’t feel so beloved, but those words do define who I am regardless of whether or not I remember them in any given moment. I can still walk in the truth regardless of how I feel or what is going on around me.

I can walk in truth because in the midst of deep, sorrow God spoke the truth of who I am. Not only did He speak it once, but He continued to speak it through His word and through others as they began to pour His love into my heart and life.

Has God spoken to you during a time of darkness or sorrow? What name did He give you during that time? Did you find it hard to believe? Was it a name that propelled healing or some other God divine purpose? God called Gideon a valiant warrior during a time when he was hiding from the enemy. God called me beloved at at time that I believed I was unlovable. What does He call you?

But now, thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob, And he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; You are mine. Isaiah 43:1-2

 

¹ Beloved of God by Sally Hall

² Psalm 139

 

Today I am joining these lovely ladies. Check them out!

His Precious Child

He saw me before the foundations of the earth ever came into being. He saw all of my life in that one moment, from the beginning to the end. He knew me and loved me.

He knew that as a little girl I would have hopes, dreams, love deeply and enjoy life.  I would be  precious to my Father and He too had such hopes and dreams for me. From the moment He fashioned me He fell in love. He had never seen anyone so beautiful. For He believed that each of His creations were filled with such beauty and so precious to Him. But tears fell down His eyes as He held me, His precious daughter. He would watch me grow; and see how I made Him laugh with the silly things I’d do and say. Oh how I would love life and see the beauty of it all.  My tender child’s heart caused Him to smile.

His smile was also filled with sadness, for He knew what was to come. He knew I would not understand the life that I would live.  He knew what I would suffer. My Father would weep for the pain and suffering I would endure. He knew He had the power to stop it; a suffering that would leave me numb and lost. A suffering that would change me forever. Man’s sin would leave it’s mark on my life. I would make sinful choices of my own. Sin that would bring more pain, heartache and suffering. But in that moment my Father saw another One suffer an even greater suffering. One who would not deserve to suffer and yet choose to. He saw His Son suffer for the sins of all mankind. His suffering, and death would set me free. Because of His suffering I would be healed.

It would take years for me to understand though. It would take walking through darkness and pain before I would be able to see what His suffering meant for me. But, my Father knew I would someday have an even greater understanding of His suffering because of what I would suffer. I would, in part,  see His suffering and understand the pain and the torment He went through because of my own suffering. In the midst of seeing His suffering I would then see the hope, the beauty of His suffering for me. His beauty would then reflect in my face.

Until then I would feel so alone and abandoned. I would walk in such darkness, afraid.  How could He help me understand He was with me? He had His arms wrapped so tightly around me, loving me, but I would not know. I could not see His tears fall as evil took over my body. I could not hear Him weeping loudly and painfully. His groans would be so loud that all of heaven could hear. I would not know that He felt all my pain. He would feel the tearing of my soul and the tears that would not come. "Vengeance is mine He'll cry!" "You will not destroy her! For out of this evil I will create beauty. Out of these ashes I will create a garland." "Oh my child, I will not leave you."

Before the foundations of the world were ever formed He knew me and tears ran down His face. He knew what His precious little girl would walk through. The years of pain that she would not understand until she had grown. In that moment He held her tightly and whispered, "My Beloved, I love you, I will walk with you. I will not leave you alone."

(This was originally published on this blog in 2008. Today God brought it to mind and as I read it I ended up editing and rewriting it.)

Keep Silent and Move

God sets the people free from their slavery. He, through Moses, has just lead the people out of Egypt to a dead end right up to the shores of the Red Sea. Behind them are the Egyptians. The Israelites become frightened. In fact they become so frightened as they look around at their circumstances that they begin to lament how much better is would have been to stay slaves than to die in the wilderness. (Ex 14:8-12)

Moses, knowing what God is about to do (14:1-4, 15-18) and believing that He would save them, says to the people, “Do not fear! Stand by and see the salvation of the Lord which He will accomplish for you today…”(v.13) Moses believed that God had a plan to save them. He trusted that God would not free His people only to bring them out to the wilderness to die. I love what Moses continues on to say in verse 14. He tells the people that God will fight for them so they need to just stop whining.

Okay so it may not say it in those exact words but seriously don’t we need to be told the “keep silent” at times? Just stop your whining about how bad things look right now and trust God to work it all out. I am so often like the Israelites when things get bad and I can’t see any way out. It appeared to them that there was no way out. To move forward, it seemed they might drown, and to stay or turn back they faced an enemy that is far stronger. So they began to complain, instead of trusting in what God was about to do.

I have seriously been in this place lately. I don’t understand what God is doing in my life or where He is taking me. I may not be facing death, but I look around at my life and often begin to whine and complain about the things I don’t like or understand. Like the Israelites I look at my circumstances instead of trusting in what God is going to do.

I love what God says to Moses next. In verse 15 He says to tell the Israelites “to go forward”. In other words, keep silent, stop complaining, and move forward. In verse 21 we see that God tells them to move forward because He is about to make a way for them to cross the sea. But honestly, I can’t imagine that the sea parted and they just joyful ran across singing praises. Maybe they did, scripture doesn’t say. But I can’t help but think they were human and they had just been whining!

Yes they did move forward. They did begin to walk across, they were obedient. But I can’t help but put myself there for a moment. I can only imagine what my thoughts might be and perhaps what there thoughts might have been. I am sure I would be afraid as I walked across the walls of water, I mean who has ever separated a body of water? Would it hold up or will it come crashing down on me? Yet I would walk because somewhere deep inside me I have faith. I would trust, even though I might be trembling, that if God could hold up the water then surely He meant to save me. Surely He would see me safely across the sea and rescue me from the Egyptians. I wouldn’t understand, but I would move.

This is faith. To move forward believing that God is with you even though you do not understand what He is doing. It’s walking in hard, and even impossible, circumstances believing that God will rescue you. It’s to move forward trusting that God has a plan.

Oh how I want to live a life that is consistent in this area. Next time I am tempted to start whining or complaining about my present struggles I pray that I will remember to just keep silent, move forward and watch what God is about to do.

I love that! Keep silent, move forward and watch what God will do! Let’s remember that next time we face the seemingly impossible!

 

This blog is part of my 2015 journey through the word. Please click to find more in this series.

When We Get Stuck

In our suffering we often get stuck in the moment. We do not know the whole story and we get stuck on what ever page we happen to be on. Or perhaps we get stuck in a whole chapter. I am reminded of this idea of being stuck when I read the story of Joseph. Joseph could have fallen into discouragement when his brothers sold him into slavery. But he didn’t. He could have just given up and had a pity party when he was thrown into prison, but we don’t see any record of that. What we do see is a young man who kept on doing what he believed God wanted him to do. He didn’t lose faith and he served His God regardless of what his current circumstances were. In Genesis 39:22-23 we read that God showed him favor in prison, I can’t imagine he would do that if Joseph was sitting around all the time feeling sorry for himself.

Joseph could have gotten stuck in self pity, but he didn’t. Oh it’s possible that he had moments of questioning God. After all he did ask the cup bearer to remember him so that he could be freed. He went on to say that he was in prison for not good reason. (40:14-15) I am sure that he had moments of doubts, questions and maybe even self-pity. But the cupbearer did not remember Joseph and stayed in prison another 2 years. Two years, that’s a long time to be forgotten. So it’s possible he had moments, but the point is he never got “stuck”.

One reason that I believe Joseph had to have an over all right attitude, one that was not given into major pity parties or discouragement is that in the end Joseph was able to see the purpose of his suffering when he said in Genesis 45:7-8 "God sent me before you to preserve for you a remnant in the earth, and to keep you alive by a great deliverance. "Now, therefore, it was not you who sent me here, but God; and He has made me a father to Pharaoh and lord of all his household and ruler over all the land of Egypt.” You just don’t spend year in self pity and discouragement over your suffering and arrive at this truth.

But what is even more fascinating to me is Joseph’s story in light of an entire nation’s story.  To fully understand we need to go back to Genesis 15:13. God gives Abram a peek into the future when He says, "Know for certain that your descendants will be strangers in a land that is not theirs, where they will be enslaved and oppressed four hundred years.” God was going to make a great nation from the descendants of Abram (later called Abraham). God would fulfill a promise in the midst of a nation’s oppression and slavery.

We see in Genesis 46:2-4 God’s plan for His people when He says to Jacob, "I am God, the God of your father; do not be afraid to go down to Egypt, for I will make you a great nation there. "I will go down with you to Egypt, and I will also surely bring you up again; and Joseph will close your eyes." God was putting into motion a plan to build a great nation. When Jacob went into Egypt there were over seventy of his descendants.  When the nation left Egypt many put the estimate in the two to three million number of Israelites that left. God’s promise to Abraham was indeed fulfilled. They were a great nation.

The story that takes place from Genesis 15 to the end of Exodus involves decades of individual stories. At any point the characters could have gotten stuck. They did often make wrong choices and tried to help God along, but in the end each one remained faithful whether or not they understood the how the story would end. God used the individual stories of Abraham, Jacob, and Joseph to build a nation and fulfill a promise. In the process these men had to overcome many obstacles, losses and suffering. Not one of these men got to see the promise completely fulfilled and yet they remained faithful to God. They believed God was going to work it all out even though they didn’t see, this is faith.

All this causes me to pause for a moment and ask myself, “What part of my story is God using for the bigger story of redemption?” “What page or chapter am I stuck on?” “Can I look beyond today’s suffering and by faith know God has a plan for it?”

Oh beloved sisters, it’s hard some days isn’t it? To look beyond today’s pain, today’s suffering, and just trust. If we are honest we want to be able to see and know the why of it all.

I want to be like Joseph, don’t you? To suffer, yet remain faithful, knowing that God is going to use it. For Joseph, he got to see the purpose of his suffering, at least in that moment. But what he didn’t see was how God would use his slavery, and ultimately the slavery of a whole nation, to fulfill a promise made to Abraham.

As I read this story again, I want to live my life trusting that God will fulfill the promise He has made to every believer, that He will work all things out for His Glory. (Romans 8:28-30) This means I might not see the “good” today, but I can  walk in faith knowing it will come. It means I need to be content if my suffering today is for the benefit of the generations that will come after me.

We do not know how God might use today’s page of our story but this we can trust, this we can know, He will use it for His glory. Can you and I be content and remain faithful with that knowledge alone?

Can we trust God with this page of our story even if we can not see how it all ends in our lifetime?

 

This blog is part of my 2015 journey through the word. Please click to find more in this series.

Grace in the Wilderness

When I was young the wilderness seemed wild and untamed.

It brought times of isolation and pain.

My soul would groan, ache and whine at the dry, cracked unbearable surroundings.

It seemed like punishment. Torture. Abandonment.

 

Now that I am older, more intimate with the wilderness I embrace it.

Now, even though it still brings isolation, I see God.

I see grace in the wilderness as it brings growth, renewal and humility.

It brings a deeper, closer more intimate walk with God.

 

"You shall remember all the way which the LORD your God has led you in the wilderness these forty years, that He might humble you, testing you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. Deuteronomy 8:2-16

 

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This is part of the 2014 31 day writing  challenge over at the Nesting Place. You can check out my other post by clicking the image below.

Uncomfortable Grace

God will take us where we have not intended to go to produce in us what we could not achieve on our own. Listen, we had better begin to encourage and comfort and teach one another with the theology of uncomfortable grace. Because often on this side of eternity, God's grace comes to us in uncomfortable ways. Oh I long for the grace of relief and I long for the grace of release. But right now what I actually need is the grace of refinement. I need to be changed. I need to be transformed. I need to become a person of faith. That means everything I do is based on a deep and abiding belief that God is and that He's loving and He's glorious and He's kind and He's powerful and I find hope and rest in Him and Him alone. That's what I need to become. 

So in love, He will take me beyond my wisdom, beyond my strength, beyond the bounds of my character. That's not God forgetting me. That's not God beating me up. That's not God being unfaithful or inattentive. The Bible calls that grace. I'm being rescued. I'm being restored. I'm being loved. I'm being changed. He loves me and He will not turn from His work and He will continue and continue and continue until that work is complete. That's grace.

Paul D Tripp (The Difference Between Amazement and Faith)

I’ve been think a lot about this. Sometimes the really hard things that come our way in this life is God’s grace. He is allowing these things in order to refine us. He uses them to show us the idols our hearts are holding on to.

I don’t know about you but I agree with Paul Tripp, I need to be transformed. I need to changed. I need my faith to be stronger, deeper and richer. So if this is what I need isn’t it then God’s grace that brings those things in my life that will help strip away all that keeps me from growing?

Isn’t it His grace, albeit an uncomfortable grace, that allows whatever it takes to expose the idols, sins and wrong attitudes that keep us from being conformed to His image?

What do you think? Are you experiencing an uncomfortable grace? What is God showing you through it?

Grace in the Midst of Doubt

I've had some unexpected questions, doubts really, over the last few weeks. The hours prior to my husband's mom passing away two weeks ago, as we stood watching, praying,  and waiting, I kept wondering if God is really who He says He is. At first the question surprised me and I quickly dismissed it. But as I sat there watching and thinking about the realization that she was about to go to heaven a question began to haunt me. What if God (and heaven) isn't real? What if we die and that's just it? What if there is nothing beyond this life?

As these thoughts fought through my mind I kept reminding myself that I did believe. I know, that I KNOW God is real and yet the doubts remained. How could I doubt the God who I KNOW exists? Please hear me, my faith is strong and there is a part of me, deep inside that knew, I mean really KNOWS that God is real. I KNOW that when I die I will live forever with Him.

Yet, where did the doubts come from? How could I doubt? Why were they here? Now? Of course my godly mother-in-law would be in heaven, rejoicing in the presence of Jesus.  It wasn’t a moment of doubting her salvation, but doubting who God is. How could I doubt a God would had been faithful to me for so much?

How indeed, Then I was reminded that even John the Baptist asked the question in Luke 7:20 " Are you the Messiah we've been expecting, or should we keep looking for someone else?'" John, cousin of Jesus. The very John who Malachi had prophesied about coming to make a way for The Christ. (Mal 3:1),  John who recognized Jesus when He came to be baptized. (Matt 3:14) This is the John who had a moment of doubt and wondered if Jesus was who He said He was.

Jesus' answer to John's question was simply, “go tell John what you have seen and heard”. They had seen Jesus heal the sick, cast out evil spirits and restore sight to the blind. They had seen the lame walk, the lepers healed,  and the dead raised to life again. They had heard the Good News being preached.

Many lives were being changed by Jesus. They were being radically transformed from a life of mere existence to complete healing. They were given a new life! 

Jesus simply said let my actions speak to who I am. What He didn't do is scorn John for asking. He wasn't angry or frustrated by the question. He was disappointed in John’s momentary doubts. I think at that moment, as John faced death, Jesus understood the question. He understood that our finite minds just can't possibly wrap our minds around an infinite God. Jesus understood the doubt and simply reminded them of who He is.

Jesus does that for us too. We are faced with circumstances whether it’s death, sorrow, pain or any number of things, that cause doubt. Instead of being angry or giving us a lecture Jesus simply takes us by the hand and reminds us of what we've seen. He reminds us of the lives we've seen changed, the eyes that have been opened and the nearly dead brought back to life. He reminds us of answered prayers and moments of strength in the midst of utter weakness. Jesus reminds us of who He IS.

Jesus does not condemn us for asking the question, “Are You who You say You are?”. Instead He gives us grace. It's in the midst of His grace that our faith is made stronger. 

Join me for 31 Days of Seeking Grace

Also linking up with these lovely ladies….