He Carried Me Down the Mountain

 

There was a time when I was discouraged in my healing, and I felt like I had somehow ended up right back where I started. It felt like the same emotions, the same questions, the same ache. I remember saying to a dear friend, “Why am I here again? Haven’t I already worked through this?”

She offered me a picture I’ve never forgotten and in the years since I have thought a lot about what she said. 

She told me, “Trauma can feel like living alone on top of a mountain. Isolated. Exposed. Stuck in a place you never meant to stay. If we are honest, it’s a place we never wanted to be. But it felt safe up there. Eventually, healing must come, and healing—real healing—is the long journey of walking down off that mountain.

But it’s not a straight path.

It winds.

It circles.

It doubles back in ways that can make you feel disoriented.

So sometimes, when you look around, it feels like you’re standing in the same place you’ve already been. The same view. The same terrain. The same pain is rising in familiar ways.

But you’re not.

You’re just on the same side of the mountain…further down than you were before.”

That truth settled deep in me.

Because I realized what felt like failure was actually progress. What felt like being stuck was really movement—slow, steady, often unseen, but it was real. Healing isn’t a clean descent. It is layered, patient, and sometimes painfully repetitive.

Over time, I realized something else too—I did come down off that mountain. Not in a single moment, not in a dramatic breakthrough, but step by step, grace by grace.

And even now, I know there will always be places in me that need healing. Always more growing to do. But I am not where I once was. I have come down off that mountain.

The lessons I learned there still live in me. The strength that was formed there didn’t disappear when the season changed. And more than anything, I did not walk that mountain alone.

There was One who walked with me every step of the way.

The One who, when I was too weary to keep going, carried me.

And He still does.

So when I find myself in a place that feels familiar—when old wounds whisper or old struggles resurface—I remind myself:

This isn’t the top of the mountain. I’ve already come down.

I See You Through Grace

 

It's been two years. 

I don’t know if this is normal, but in the two years since you’ve been gone, I’ve come to understand you more.

Maybe it’s because I’ve changed. I see things differently now.

I look at your life, and I see the little girl who grew into a woman, a wife, a mother, a young widow, a grieving parent, a grandmother, and a child of God.

I see the trauma you walked through. The hardships. The suffering. The uncertainty. And I realize that in each season, you did what you believed was best.

You did the best you could with the knowledge you had at the time. Isn’t that all any of us can do?

It wasn’t always perfect. Mistakes were made. But you kept showing up. 

I know I said this, in part, at the end of your life, and I hope you fully understood. I am grateful God has given me the ability to forgive and give grace in those spaces that hurt, or I just didn’t understand. 

I’m still learning from your life. Still growing, still softening, still understanding. And so in that way, you are still with me.

And now, with time and distance, I can say what I couldn’t before: I see you with grace. I carry less blame, less hurt, and more understanding. I hope you knew, even when I didn’t know how to show it, that I loved you.

Friendship: Being Intentional

 I am exceedingly grateful for the women God has brought into my life to encourage me on toward being more like Christ. Some have only been apart of my daily life for a season some have remained through many seasons. Both are cherished. 

My prayer for you today is that you have a friendship that encourages you to be Christ like. It’s not always easy, we live in a busy, crazy world, but it’s not impossible. I have found it takes intentionality (which I’m not always good at). I can’t just expect a godly, Titus 2 type, friendship to just find me. Oh sure, sometimes they just happen, and those are a beautiful thing. Most often though it requires both sides to be intentional about reaching out. 

Let’s make this year a year of reaching out to those friendships a little more often. Let’s not wait for friends to connect with us, let’s connect first. Check in with a text, phone call or even a card. (I know, I know!!) 

To be honest I’m preaching to myself. I truly need to be a better friend to those who are always there for me. I need to reach out more. This is one of my prayers this year. Would you pray for me as I pray for you? May we all be more intentional in our friendships.

Continue Doing What You Know Is Right

I woke up feeling heavy-hearted. 

As believers, we know we are living in difficult times. 2 Timothy 3:1 warns that the last days will be terrible. It describes these days as dangerous and filled with fear. We see people who are selfish, boastful, arrogant, and unholy. They may appear godly but deny God's true power. This has been happening for a while, but I’ve felt it intensify over the last decade. 

I won't share specifics because I believe the signs of evil are clear. At least to the Christian. Sin is being accepted and celebrated in our world, reminding us that the warnings in 2 Timothy 3 are here.

This morning, though, my heart felt especially heavy thinking about the growing evil around us. How do we get through these times? How can we stay holy in an unholy world? The answer is in God's word: we must keep doing what we have been taught

We must continue to pray. We continue to speak the truth. We continue to read and follow God’s word. We keep living for Jesus, loving each other, doing good, and being kind. We share the gospel through our words and actions. These are the things we've been taught. These are the things we know. 

It won't be easy. We will suffer for following God. We will be persecuted. We will be mocked, misunderstood, lied about... But, God has equipped us to endure through the last days. He has given us His word and His Spirit who lives in us. 

Brothers and sisters, remember, we have been given "everything we need for life and godliness" (2 Peter 1:3), which means that through His divine power, we have already received all the spiritual resources to live a godly life in this ungodly land.

Remembering My Brokenness

I recently listened to a sermon that has stuck with me. It was filled with truths that settled deep in my spirit, both convicting and encouraging me. However, one point from the sermon required some wrestling. I wasn’t sure I agreed—or, more honestly, I wasn’t sure I wanted to agree.

For decades, I’ve begged God to help me forget my sins and the sins committed against me. The memories are painful and heartbreaking—why would I want to hold onto them? And my enemy loves nothing more than to remind me of them at every turn. So wouldn't it be better not to remember?

In his sermon titled Brokenness, Voddie Baucham explained why we need to remember our sins. He argued that if we could forget them:

1.  We could never testify to the goodness of God.

2.  We would lack warnings to avoid repeating those sins.

3.  We could not rejoice in our victories or recognize the spiritual growth the Holy Spirit has produced in us.

I thought about this throughout the day. If I couldn’t remember my sins, would I still testify to God’s goodness in my life? If I forgot the hardships God delivered me from, would I still proclaim His faithfulness? Without those memories, would I continue into the same sins, never truly breaking free from their bondage? And could I recognize spiritual growth without recalling my past struggles?

His point began to make sense. I didn’t like it, but I could accept it.

As I reflect on my life—the difficult times, the sins that continue to haunt me, and the struggles I still face—I can see God’s hand at work throughout it all. With each season of my life, I recognize how God has used these lessons to help me grow. He has transformed a sinner, once headed for destruction, into someone who earnestly seeks Him.

As I look ahead, I am certain of one thing: remembering my sins does not lead to condemnation, for I am no longer condemned (Romans 8:1). However, recalling my past actions serves as a reminder that God will use everything in my life to help me grow, teach me lessons, and sanctify me. Because of this, my life will continue to bring glory to His name. Once, I was destined for eternal death, but now, through Christ, I have been given new life—eternal life.

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. Romans 5:1-5

Undefiled Religion

This morning, as I read these verses, I noticed something I hadn’t really paid attention to before. Often, when people judge the Christian religion, they say something like, "True religion means caring for orphans and widows." They use it as if it's a command. But these verses are not a command. There is no command language used here. These verses are descriptive. James is sharing that this is what your life will look like if you are following Christ. 

However, that's not the only thing James tells us about a "pure and genuine religion." In fact, he outlines three areas of our lives that reveal whether our Christian faith is pure.

Before we delve into those areas, I want to define "religion" in this context. The term can be quite broad, but here, James uses the Greek word "threskeia," which refers to the outward, organized expression of worship—ceremonies, rituals, and observances that are meant to show reverence for God. In other words, he is discussing our acts of worship, which represent our expression of faith.

What are the "acts of worship" that demonstrate our genuine devotion to God? James identifies three key areas: a controlled tongue, caring for others, and remaining uncorrupted by the world.

I believe these three points are self-explanatory, so I won’t go into great detail. However, I will share several verses from the Bible that highlight how serious God is about these aspects of our lives. While many people stress caring for orphans and widows, if we neglect the other two areas, our worship becomes meaningless.

The Tongue: The Bible has much to say about our speech. Ephesians 4:29 encourages us to ensure our words are constructive and beneficial. Matthew 12:36–37 warns us that we will be accountable for every careless word we speak. James 3:5-8 explains that the tongue is difficult to control. Psalm 34:13 and 1 Peter 3:10 instruct us to avoid lying and speaking evil.

Caring for Others: There are numerous verses regarding this topic. Psalm 82:3 states, "Give justice to the weak and the fatherless..." 1 Timothy 5:3-4 says, "Honor widows who are truly widows..." and Proverbs 28:27 tells us, "Those who give to the poor will lack nothing..."

Remaining Uncorrupted by the World: Several verses address the importance of this. 1 John 2:15 advises, "Do not love the world or the things in the world..." James 4:4 warns, "You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God?" Colossians 3:2 encourages us to "Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." Romans 12:2 states, "Do not conform to the pattern of this world..." and Ephesians 4:17 reads, "...you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds."

Now, consider these questions prayerfully before the Lord and reflect on whether you are living a life of pure religion:

- Is your relationship with Jesus positively impacting others?

- Do you know when and how to speak in a way that edifies fellow believers?

- Are you caring for those less fortunate in a manner that also shares the gospel?

- Does your love for Jesus inspire you to avoid moral impurity?

Finding My Father

Over the past few weeks, a memory from my nineteen-year-old self has begun to resurface in my mind, almost as if it were trying to tell me something. I can’t quite grasp why now; it has remained tucked away in my mind for years, perhaps forgotten entirely. I am sitting in a booth. Across from me sat a leader from a campus ministry I was involved in. I was nervous, afraid and unsure of what I was about to tell him.

I had requested this meeting because there was something heavy on my heart—a confession I desperately needed him to hear from my own lips rather than through the whispers of others. It was about a sin I had committed, one that would soon come to light, changing my life forever.

As I revealed my burden, he listened quietly for a few moments, a deep sadness reflected in his eyes. I braced myself for judgment, but instead, I encountered an overwhelming sense of empathy. His eyes conveyed genuine sorrow rather than condemnation. Finally he asked, "Sharon, I have noticed for some time that it seems you are searching for something. What is it that you are looking for?" 

That question echoed in my mind, haunting me long after our conversation had ended. I struggled to find a response; I was lost and without direction. All I knew was that, despite being a Christian for three years, there was an unsettling emptiness within me. I felt like a ship adrift at sea, longing for land but unsure of my destination. What I failed to recognize in that moment—and what I would later come to understand—was that I was missing my Father. His love and presence were the very things my heart craved, even if I didn’t yet know it.

Ten years passed before I would begin a journey that would finally answer that question. In that time I followed Jesus but largely ignored the Father. I read the New Testament, but I did my best to stay away from the Old Testament. This disregard for the Old Testament wasn’t always a conscious choice. Before I became a Christian, I had once said that I didn't need God as a Father; I neither needed nor wanted a Father. So when a friend told me about Jesus, it was easier for me to accept Him. It’s not that I didn't believe in God the Father; I was simply ambivalent toward Him.

God brought a woman in my life who would become a dear friend. We raised our families together, prayed and studied God's word together. It was in those times spent with her and doing Bible study she would begin to share with me her relationship with her Father God. 

Her relationship with The Father was tender, merciful and unlike anything I knew  I wanted what she had. I wanted to feel no hesitation in running to the Father with my hopes, dreams, and my shame. I wanted to walk into the throne room, bow before the Father and feel loved, not constant condemnation. 

Now, some 30 years later I am more confident. I can still struggle but what I know that was different then is who God says He is. You see, I viewed my Heavenly Father through the lens of poor and abusive father figures. I have very few memories of my actual father but the men who came after him were not good. So my view of what a father should be like tainted my view of God. 

When I realized, or better said, when God revealed my wrong view of who God is I began searching for truth. I wanted to know who He was and is. I have mostly found that in studying God’s character through the studying if His names. With each name I gained a greater depth of who He is. I began to realize that all those years ago I was searching for my Father, my good, kind and merciful Heavenly Father. The Father who loves me unconditionally and sent Jesus to die for me. What an amazing love the Father has for me.

One of the studies that helped me tremendously was Kay Arthur’s Lord, I Want to Know You.  It is a study of the names of God  

Jehovah Sees and Provides

Recently, I read Philippians 4:19 and discovered a deeper meaning beyond God simply providing for our everyday needs. This verse demonstrates that God meets not only our physical and emotional essentials but also our spiritual needs.

Reflecting on Genesis 22:14, where Abraham names a place "The Lord Will Provide" (Jehovah Jireh), we see God’s profound care for His children. In this context, God tested Abraham’s faith by asking him to sacrifice Isaac. Abraham’s willingness to comply prompted God to provide a ram as a substitute, highlighting His mercy and provision.

The name Jehovah (YHWH) means "I am the one who is," emphasizing His eternal presence. Jireh means "to see" and "to provide," illustrating that God recognizes our circumstances and proactively meets our needs, giving us confidence to trust Him, especially in challenging times.

As we reflect on Philippians 4:19 and Genesis 22:14, we should consider our greatest need: to be in a right relationship with God. This relationship was fractured by the sin of Adam and Eve and has continued to be affected by the sins of humanity throughout history. In His love, God provided a way for reconciliation through Jesus Christ, allowing us to mend this broken relationship and offering us redemption and eternal communion with Him.

Where do you stand? Do you recognize yourself as a sinner? Do you believe that God desires reconciliation with you? Regardless of your current situation or past actions, God has provided a path to reconciliation. He sent His Son to die for your sins and mine. The debt is paid in full; all you need to do is believe, confess your sins, and live your life in obedience to God.

Walking In Peace

 Today my Bible study was a perfect reminder to me. Perhaps you need this too. 

In this verse God is called “ God Most High” which in Hebrew is El Elyon. This name for God means “Highest” or “Exalted One” and emphasizes that God is the highest in every realm of life.  

It means He is Sovereign, He rules over all things. He is in control and there is no plan of man that can change His sovereign will for His creation. 

This reminder allows me to walk in peace knowing that no matter what happens, no matter how chaotic life might get, God has a plan and it will unfold according to His timing and purpose. I can walk through all things trusting in a God who has a good and perfect plan. 

He Speaks in our Sorrow

"As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, And at the last He will take His stand on the earth, “Even after my skin is destroyed, Yet from my flesh I shall see God; Whom I myself shall behold, And whom my eyes will see and not another. My heart faints within me!" Job 19: 25-27

Recently, I found myself reflecting on a verse that made me wonder: How did Job know? Although I don't fully understand how the concept of the Redeemer was revealed to him, I am certain that Job had hope in what he believed about Jesus. Even amid immense sorrow and suffering, Job found hope in the knowledge that his Redeemer lives and that one day he would see God. His hope was anchored in Jesus, who had yet to come. Job had a relationship with God, and the Spirit of God had revealed the truth about a Redeemer to his spirit. 

In the face of great loss, pain, and sorrow, Job found comfort in the belief that although his skin would decay, his flesh would one day see God. We, too, share that same hope. No matter what challenges we encounter today or how deep our pain may feel, we can find solace in the knowledge that our Redeemer lives. Jesus came to Earth, died for us, and now He lives; one day, He will return for His bride.

Just as God gave Job hope in his sorrow, He also provides us with hope. We have hope that our Redeemer lives, hope that He will return, and hope that even though pain and sorrow may accompany us, one day we will see God. On that day, there will be no more pain or sorrow.

How did Job maintain hope in the face of overwhelming sorrow? He looked to the promises of God. He chose to believe and to praise the promise of his Redeemer. I pray that as we face our own losses and pain, we too will focus on what has been promised. I pray we will choose to give praise because we KNOW our Redeemer lives!

Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though our outer man is decaying, our inner man is being renewed day by day. For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we focus not on what is seen, but on what is not seen; for the things that are seen are temporary, while the things that are not seen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:16-17)

 

Linking up with Me, Coffee and Jesus plus….

Does God Want Heaven Without Us?

 Lately I have been wondering, "Does God want heaven without us? Would He be lonely in heaven if He hadn't made a away for us to join Him? 

The question came a few weeks ago while we were singing the Hillsong "What a Beautiful Name it is".  There is a line in the song that says ‘You didn’t want heaven without us. So Jesus, you brought heaven down."  Now I've sung the song many times but it wasn't until this moment that I stopped and asked if this line was true.

Was God lonely without us? Does God need us? As I thought through that I realized the answer is no. God is not lonely. To say different is to say that somehow God is insufficient in and of Himself which we know to be false. Scripture says God is self-sufficient. That He doesn't need anything outside of Himself to exist.

God is in need of nothing. He doesn’t need our worship, our work or anything we might think to offer Him. As Paul says in Acts 17:25, “Nor is He worshiped with men’s hands, as though He needed anything, since He gives to all life, breath, and all things”. 

If God does not need us, then why did He create us? The answer is simply “for His pleasure.” Revelation 4:11 says, “You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.” Colossians 1:16  also says,  “All things were created by him and for him.”  We were created for His pleasure. It gave God pleasure to create humans to have a relationship with them, not because He needed them. 

God made us in His image with an ability to know Him, to worship Him, to serve and to have fellowship with Him. We were created to bring glory and honor to God, not because He needed a friend. 

I came across this by John Piper and he expresses thoughts on this so much better than I can. 

When we Feel Forgotten, Trust in Him

O LORD, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day?

How long will my enemy have the upper hand?

Turn and answer me, O LORD my God! Restore the light to my eyes, or I will die.

Don't let my enemies gloat, saying, "We have defeated him!" Don't let them rejoice at my downfall.

But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. I will sing to the LORD because he has been so good to me. Psalm 13 (NLT)

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I love these words of David. He, who God says is “a man after My own heart” understood what it meant to be deeply sad in his soul.

He felt forgotten. He felt that God no longer saw him. He thought he might die if God didn’t answer.

I get it. I’ve been there. I struggle often with a deep sadness of the soul. But, like David, I refuse to stay there.

The first thing David does is pray. He prays honestly, pouring out exactly how he feels  He asks God to defeat his enemy. Davide understands that depression, or a deep sadness of the soul, is an enemy that must be battled. We must pray to God for help in battling this enemy.

Then he reminds himself of the truth. He chooses to rejoice because God will rescue him. He can still sing in the sadness because God has been good. God is good!

David relies on the truth he already has learned about God. God can be trusted to rescue him even if in the moment he feels forgotten.

David has learned that no matter what life may look like today God can be trusted to show His unfailing love and goodness in the midst of it all.

David relies on truth not emotions. Sometimes that is hard because emotions seem real, but we must take our feelings to God and allow Him to speak truth into them.  May he be our example in those moments we might feel forgotten and alone.

 

Thank you, God, for this reminder today. I can trust in Your goodness and unfailing love. Help me to focus on Your truth when the lies of the enemy come. Amen

Weary Yet Pursuing

They are three little words, yet they were what was needed to encourage my heart today. The words were from Judges 8:4 which says, "weary yet pursuing". 

  

    The context of those words was written amid battle. Gideon and his army of 300 men had been fighting against the Midianites. God had already delivered 3 leaders into their hands and they were still pursuing more. They needed food to be strengthened, but those around them did not come to their rescue. Instead of giving up, they pursued their enemy, even though they were weary. (There is a lot more to the story, and I encourage you to read it in Judges 8, but God used those three little words to encourage me this day.)

    When I am tired and weary of the battle where do I go? Who do I turn to? How do I cope with the weariness that I feel? What should I pursue instead of giving in to the weariness of my soul? 

    Too often I want to go to people, and while the body of Christ can and should be a good source of refreshment often they fail. They fail because we have gone to them first, we've put our hope in their strength to encourage and lift us up instead of Christ. They fail because they have battles of their own to fight. 

So before going to others, even the body of Christ, we must go to God. We must go to His word. It's here, and here alone that I am refreshed and encouraged.

    I forget this so many times and run to people. But today it was God's words that refreshed this tired and weary heart. Perhaps they too will refresh your weary heart.

 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the LORD , the Creator of the ends of the earth Does not becomewearyor tired. His understanding is inscrutable.  He gives strength to theweary, And to him who lacks might He  increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired, And vigorous young men stumble badly, Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary. (Isaiah 40:28-31)

"For I satisfy the weary ones and refresh everyone who languishes." (Jer 31:25)

Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For my yoke is easy and My burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30)

Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. (Gal 6:9)

For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 12:3)

    Jesus will be our strength, in Him we will find rest. Run to Him, pursue Him through His words to you.

    So what should we do instead of giving in to weariness, discouragement, depression, anxieties, or any other ways we may try to deal with hard times? What does God's word say I should pursue instead of giving in to my weariness?

 O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, In a dry and weary land where there is no water. (Psalm 63:1)

So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. (Rom 14:19) 

... pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness. (1 Timothy 6:11) 

...seek peace and pursue it.  (Heb 12:14; 1 Peter 3:11)

  Today may we choose to seek God and the things of God. May we pursue that which will build us up instead of tearing us down. May we fall on our knees before the cross, pray to know God, and pursue Him in a greater, deeper way.