Lately I have been thinking a lot about my sister. I have beautiful memories of growing up with her. We were friends, confidants, each others support system, and almost inseparable. Only 22 months apart we were not only close in age, but close in heart.
There were the typical sister arguments over borrowed clothes, whose turn it was to do chores, but nothing so serious that we couldn’t or didn’t make up within the minutes.
We spent a lot of time together talking, laughing, sharing our hopes and dreams, our sorrows and deep hurts. We would play dress up, do each others hair. Play with our dolls, play house. We rode bikes, drove cars and had boy friends.
We shared secrets, although there were secrets that we didn’t share that we probably should have. But I think deep down inside they didn’t need to be shared, we just knew. We understood the hurt, and the pain of the kept secrets locked deep within. It would only be when we were older that we could fully disclose those secrets, to embrace them and each other.
I love my sister deeply and as I think upon our growing up years I choose to focus on the good. The joy of having a sister to be there, no matter what. A sister who really understands, because she’s been there living life with you. A sister who would drop her plans just to be with you because you needed a friend.
Today I miss her. We live miles apart, not because several states separate us, but life has separated us.
It’s been years since I have felt emotionally close to her. I’ve tried. I’ve called. But honestly we only speak about 2 or 3 times a year and that is when I call her. I don’t think it hurts as much as it used to, and quite honestly I don’t know if that is a good thing. It does make me sad.
Sad because I’ve lost a friend. She will always be family, but I miss the closeness that once was. Some will tell me that God will give us spiritual sisters. It is true He does. But it’s not the same. It’s not as if she can be replaced.
Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I have my expectations set too high. I just know that if my sister needed me I would be there. I would drop everything, if possible, and be there for her. My needs, my desires would take second place to hers. Isn’t that what a sister does?
I would call her, just because I wanted to hear her voice. I would want that consistent connection with her in order to encourage, love and pray for her and with her.
As I write this I am thinking I should pursue her more than I have been lately. I should write her notes of encouragement. Call her. Love her, not just in word but in deed.
I need to continue doing so until God clearly tells me to stop or calls me home, REGARDLESS of whether or not she ever returns a single call or note.
This is love. This is what Christ calls me to do.
Once again I am reminded that I MUST find my worth, my value, my confidence, my security in Christ and in Him ALONE. It is Christ IN me that gives me hope. He alone fills me up with a love that is everlasting. A love that is complete. Others will fail us. They will leave us, if not because of circumstances, by death. They will be distance at times. We will grow apart.
But Christ will never leave us or forsake us. Nothing can ever separate us from Him! Amen? AMEN!
What about you? Do you have a sister? Are you close? What could you do today to begin to reconnect if there is a distance that has grown between you? How might you encourage her today?
If you and your sister are very close I would love to have you share what kind of things you do together to stay close! What are some of your favorite things to do together?
Would love to hear what God lays on your heart?