A Lament for Healing

I wrote this a few months ago as I realized that I was not going into remission. My almost 4 year battle with Hypothyroidism, due to Graves Disease will soon result in a thyroid removal. Sometimes healing doesn’t come as we desire. And though I know God could cause me to go into remission or healing me completely so Graves is gone, He hasn’t chosen too. I don’t know why, but I do know He loves me and that His purposes for my life are good. 

Oh Lord how long will I struggle?

 How long will my body work against me?

 Do you see me fight the darkness. 

Where are You? 

I pray for healing but it does not come. 

Why are you silent? 

 

 O Lord I need you!

 I need to feel Your Spirit within me. 

I need to know you are with me

Even if healing never comes. 

Free me from this life!

Show me how to live with pain yet joy.  

Lord God, I know you are good. 

I know your purposes are true and holy.

 You have everything in your hands. 

You rule the nations and keep all things together. 

I know you keep me too.

 

Your purposes are beyond my understanding. 

Your ways are higher than mine. 

I want to be in Your will. 

I will be content in whatever You do. 

Father I pray for healing, 

Yet Your will be done.