A Letter to My Younger Self:
Oh baby girl, He sees you sitting over there trying to hide. I know you believe you are invisible, You believe you are unloved and unlovable. You believe you’d be better off dead.
I wish I could travel through time and take you in my arms and hold you. No little girl should feel the pain you feel at this moment. No little girl should feel so unlovable. If I could reach back and touch your heart, your soul, I would tell you that you are not alone. I would whisper in your ear truths of His love, His everlasting love.
I would tell you that you are very much loved.
I would tell you that He sees. He sees what they have done. He sees the scars that you bear on your soul. He sees every tear that you cry and collects them in His bottle. He weeps with you.
If I could take you by the hand I would lead you to a safe place in His arms. It would be there, in His arms, that you would realize just how precious you are to Him. He calls you His. You are His beloved.
I know you can’t believe these things right now. But if you could just know that you will get through this. Yes you will suffer. There will be things that just don’t make sense. The hurt inside you will threaten to rip apart your soul. But even though you can’t see Him, He is there. He will not leave you.
Oh precious one, hold on. You are stronger than you feel at this moment. You will grow up into a woman that knows the One who watches over you. The One who is holding you, weeping and singing over you this very moment. Can you sense that presence within you that doesn’t quite feel real? It’s Him, and one day you’ll see that He has been with you always.
Oh Beloved, I know that this doesn’t make sense to you right now. I know it all seems so ugly, wrong and you want to escape. And sweet child, it may never make complete sense to you but one day you will be able to rise above it all. You will be able face the pain, walk through it and lay it at His feet. I promise you that one day you will look back and see how God will use this pain in your life.
So precious girl, knowing this, will you come out from hiding? Can you find your voice? Will you scream? Tell someone what they did. Tell anyone. Keep telling them until they believe. Can you do that?
Oh I know you’ve tried. I know, baby girl, that you’ve found your voice many times and you’ve spoken loudly.
The One who watches over your soul, the One who chose you before the foundations of the earth, the One who calls you beloved, He heard you. And one day knowing that He heard will be enough.
One day, when you are grown, you will find your voice again and you will speak so others can hear. You will see just how loved you are.
Sharing these words to a younger self over here at The High Calling.