Family Friday: The Nest is Empty

Bird Nest

From the moment I held my sweet babies in my arms I knew there would come a day when they would leave.

Somewhere deep inside my mother’s heart I knew there would come a day when I would no longer be needed. My job would be done.

There were days when I thought that an empty nest wasn’t coming fast enough. The days would pass ever so slowly. Older women, wiser women, would say to me “enjoy every moment, before you know it they’ll be gone.”

I would try to enjoy every moment, to make memories and allow other things to fade in the back ground and pour my life into my boys. Then there were days, moments in the life of being a mom, that I just wish they were grown already.

I loved being a mom. It’s the hardest job I have ever had. But it’s really not a job, it’s a privilege, a ministry, a role of a lifetime. Having your child wrap their little arms around you, and say “mommy I love you” makes the hard times of being a mother melt away.

But they do grow up. They become independent. They leave the nest. They build there own homes, family and life. I knew the day would arrive and quite honestly in the later teens years I was totally ready for them to move out.

As they grow up there becomes this natural pulling away. They become young men. God placed a natural desire for them to want to leave and become “king” of their own castle. It’s the way it should be. It’s what I prepared them to do. As a mom I trained, prayed, loved, encouraged, prayed and prayed that they would grow into responsible godly men.

What I wasn’t prepared for was the void it would leave in my heart. I wasn’t prepared for this season of my life.

My nest has been empty for a year and a half. So why is it hitting me so hard now? Honestly in the beginning it was exciting watching them grow up and move on. There were rooms to paint, redecorate and there was a sense of excitement as they left.

Then the quiet settles in around you. Some days it’s just too quiet.

I wonder, “now what”? There is a feeling that I am no longer needed. A sense of having no purpose.What do I want to do when I grow up? I don’t have an answer. These emotions are new. I didn’t expect them. I wasn’t prepared.

I am unsure of my future. I don’t believe for even a moment God is finished with me. As I seek His path for my life now, in this new season, it seems that more doors close than open. It adds to the feeling of not being needed and dare I say it, wanted.

I draw closer to my God. I listen. I am quiet. I wait.

It’s hard. It’s really hard, the place I am in now. Waiting. Waiting for God’s timing and not rushing ahead of Him. I have done that, rushed ahead, it doesn’t work. I know without a doubt that the safest place to be is in the middle of His will. In His presence. I long for that.

So with a heart that misses being a mommy to my two little boys I wait with a heart of excitement to see what God is going to do.


  1. Sharon, this could have been written by me straight from my heart.

    Although my dreams were of three little girls growing up, going to college and then marriage, I never ever dreamed of them all moving away.

    My heart has been so raw that I actually thought the wounds would never heal. I hurt both day and night and couldn't stop crying for two years.

    By the time #3 left I was prepared. Although it's been 10 years since my first one left home and moved 1200 miles away I can now say it feels like yesterday.

    God has truly seen me through and pulled me out of the pit and set me on high ground. I sought Him and He was there.

    Most days I feel happy and satisfied. I cannot say that I've found my purpose as of yet. I've tried several paths, but none bring fulfillment. I continue to wait and listen to that still small voice.

    I love that you posted about this time in your life. I longed to know all those years ago that there was someone somewhere feeling the same lonely and emptiness as me.

    My the Lord bless you and keep you as you travel this new road of being a mother with her children grown and gone.

    I pray someday to live near at least of my girls and experience being a grandmother and all that goes with it.

    All in His timing...

  2. Oh Ginger! I hear you! I think that is why I wrote about it. I just knew that if I was feeling it then other women were too!! I think I will continue to write about it too! :-)

    Love you dear sister!

  3. Sharon, please do continue to share on this if you feel led. I think the times I tried to blog about it I was so in the thick of it that it was so depressing and it just made my young mom readers feel sorry for me.

    Today I feel as though I should write my feelings down and how the Lord delivered me from depression and brought me to a new understanding of my new life.

  4. O dear ladies....our hearts are much the same!

    My nest began emptying out when my oldest went away to college. Then she came back home ever so briefly, then both my daughters moved out together. That left only our son who was in high school at the time. I struggled, and he was a sweet comfort. But that was short lived because a year later he left to be a US Marine. THAT was the last straw for this momma. I could not call him or know how he was for such a long time!

    I hit the proverbial wall of identity too! Seeking God, crying my heart out, reading every book I could find on anything close to the subject (I never did find that perfect book I have to say!) I think I need to write one! Maybe we could all collaborate! ;)

    I'm probably further down the road than the two of you....let me tell you that it does get better. I am blessed to now have the ultimate joy of being Mimi and that has got to be the ultimate reward!!!



Leave me some joy...