Walking by Faith and Doubt
God chooses Abraham knowing that he would not always be fully faithful in every area of his life. Instead of trusting God to protect him he chooses to tell a lie about his wife and claims she is his sister. (Genesis 12:10-20) God promised Abraham that is descendants would be "as the dust of the earth". Instead of trusting God and His timing and plan Abraham allows his wife to give him her servant Hagar in order to have a descendant. (Gen 13:14-17)
These are just two examples, but they encourage me knowing that in spite of our doubts and lack of trust, at times, God can and does still use us. It's in God's faithfulness, grace, and mercy that He still chooses us. Abraham knew God and he obeyed God (Gen 12:1-5) but he also doubted God.
To be perfectly honest, I have lived much of my life like Abraham. There are areas that I trust and obey God but in other areas of life, I have major trust issues. As I look over the last forty-one years of following God I can see clearly that my lack of trust, my doubts, have not stopped Him from working in and through my life. It's not because I am special or anything, it's simply because God is faithful even when I am not. He is faithful to continue His work in me and through me. This brings great encouragement.
Both Abraham and Sarah are described in Hebrews 11:8-11 as having faith. By faith, Sarah conceived. I love that we are reminded of her faith, not her doubts. I believe by the end of their life they had grown to trust God in a greater way than in the beginning. Abraham's faith grew to the point that he was willing to sacrifice his son (Genesis 22) to God believing that God would raise Isaac back to life. (Hebrews 11::17)
I pray that as I grow in Christ, as I grow in my faith, that I will learn to trust God in even greater degrees than I do now. I pray that I am remembered for my faith, not my doubts.
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Leave me some joy...