A Sometimes Ungrateful Heart...

Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous and how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God! They are innumerable!
Psalms 139:14-17

I so often forget that my Father's thoughts toward me are precious. Even when my heart is breaking, or I'm being a little girl with a temper tantrum - He is my Father. My FATHER, a word that used to bring fear and confusion now brings tears to my eyes because I KNOW how much He loves me.

His love is so great and His thoughts toward me are so wonderful and I am so ungrateful! My thoughts toward God are not always so wonderful. I sometimes want to run and hide behind my walls of protection for I am afraid that once again He is asking me to give up too much. But I KNOW this is not TRUTH and I choose to walk in truth.

And the TRUTH is that every day of my life has already been recorded - nothing has caught my Father by surprise. My Father's thoughts toward me are far more wonderful than anything I have ever thought or imagined.

Oh Father forgive my ungrateful heart! Search me, Father and know my heart; test me and know my thoughts.Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.(PS 139:23-24)Give me a heart that longs after you, that is completely filled up with you and who you are. Create in me a clean heart that desires your will for my life, regardless of how it might look to me. Help me to remember that you only have my good in mind.

For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me in earnest, you will find me when you seek me. I will be found by you," says the LORD. Jeremiah 29:11-14a