My marriage is not perfect but after 32+ years of working through what God says about it I have learned a few things. I have not arrived with all the answers either, in fact I am still learning, still working through issues, failures and weakness. But as a young wife I felt there were so few women talking about the struggles and how to work through them Biblically so my aim here is to gather all my marriage post in one place in hopes to help and encourage you in your journey.
Just click on the title, in bold, to read more.
Marriage is a Covenant So what does it mean to be married? To be in a covenant relationship with my husband. IS it more than just “being married” and living life together?
In Covenant We are One We are united as one with Christ in a covenant relationship. We can not be separated.
How Should I Treat My Husband? Remember, because we are one with each other and one with Christ then anything I do to my husband I am doing to Christ. In whatever way I treat a brother or sister in Christ it is as if I am doing it to Christ Himself.
What If He Doesn’t Deserve My Respect? So if I understand that correctly I find favor in the eyes of God when I do what is right regardless of how the other person might treat me. Whoa! Wait a minute! That’s just going to far! I mean the world tells me I have a “right” to be pursue happiness. I have a “right” to live in comfort. I don’t have to suffer under harsh treatment from anyone. So why would God tell me to do something that is just too difficult?
Sinning against my Husband Last week God allowed me to see that I have been responding to my husband in a way that doesn’t always show love or respect. I was reminded of a blog post I wrote last year about respect. At the end I had asked several questions. One being, “What about my attitude when speaking with him? Does my voice tones also show respect?”
A Day for Love and Serving! It’s about him. I LOVE serving him.
What Is It Like To Be Married To You? Have you ever thought about what it might be like to be married to you? So often we don’t really stop and think about what our actions and attitudes are toward our spouse. We tend to think in terms of “this is the way I am, they have to love me” Yes some will say I serve him everyday and he should serve me. I’ve heard it from other wives. But dear friends it’s never to be about me. That is not what love is about. Love is about serving, not looking to be served.
The Good Wife More than anything I want to be a good wife. Not because I love my husband, which I do dearly, but because I love God.
A Grumpy Wife Why can’t I remember that just because I might FEEL a certain way doesn’t mean my feelings are right? I hate when I allow my emotional mess to affect my husband. To effect my relationships.
To Ashley: A letter to a new bride I sat there listening to the words the pastor said and the commitment you and Gary made to one another I prayed. I prayed that you understood the commitment you were making to one another, before your friends and family, and the commitment you were making before God.
A Godly Wife What was a woman to do? What steps could I take to be a godly wife and have a godly marriage? Was there a formula I could follow? Maybe a book on “the 7 steps to a godly marriage” ?
At times, early in my marriage I would just sit and cry out to God in frustration. Where were the older women who could show me? Why couldn’t anyone see that I had NO CLUE what I was doing?
It's Not Just a Promise - We took our wedding vows and made a promise to live until death does us part. But marriage is more than a promise, it’s a covenant. A solemn binding agreement between parties, made by blood, and not breakable.
A Longing Unsatisfied - Too often when we get married we think that our spouse will fill that need, that longing to be apart of something bigger than yourself. We marry thinking that every need, especially emotionally, will be met
A Heart Ready to Hear Sometime early in our marriage I realized that if I want to encourage my husband to take a certain vacation, buy a large item for the house or really anything that requires a major amount of money that it is best to be prepared before I ask. The ways that I must prepare for my husband and for God are different and yet both require preparation and prayer. Both require that I seek my own heart with eyes ready to see what is right, ready to see what is best.
Until Death Separates Marriage, a lifelong commitment. Love, a choice one makes regardless of your feelings of the moment.
Naked and Without Shame Our relationship with God and our spouse should be open, real and genuine. Deep inside our hearts I believe we still have that desire, the desire to be totally open. To be naked emotionally. But fear causes us to hide.
What Makes a Marriage Last? My first response would be a mutual commitment to God and one another, and yet sadly statistics would not back that statement up. Recent surveys show that divorce is just as high in the church as outside the church. And I know plenty of Christian marriages that are not filled with a growing, deeper love for one another. So what IS the difference?
Who Is My Husband Anyway? During a recent study on Loving God and Loving Others I began to understand in a much deeper way how I am to love others. We talked about loving our neighbors, our enemies and the brethren. Jokingly someone asked so who is our husband? Is he our neighbor, enemy or brethren? Is there a different love reserved for our husbands? Well I pray he is not your enemy, but regardless scripture is pretty clear on how we are to treat one another.
Learning to Love in Marriage I did not marry for love. Oh, I wanted to be loved, needed to be loved. But, I had long lost any hope of ever finding real love. I didn’t understand love. I didn’t really know how to love.
A Love That Never Quits There was a time when God brought a young man into the life of a very lost and confused young woman. God would tell him on that day “this is the one I have for you!” His heart was instantly drawn to hers!
A Radiant Bride His bride was walking across the lawn with her father. The groom had not yet seen her. They passed behind a tree. It was about at time that the groom looked up to see his bride step out from behind the tree. As she stepped out the rays of the sun shone down on her creating a picture of pure radiance.
Keeping Your Marriage Alive As I have talked with young couples over the years I have been amazed by the number of couples who have never been away from their children for a weekend, and some, haven't even really been on a "date" since having children. My advice to them is always the same. "For the sake of your children you need to make your relationship a high priority."
Friendship in Marriage When I married my husband he was more friend than lover. At twenty one I hardly knew true love. I knew selfish love, abusive love, conditional love but true love? Not really. So when I walked down that aisle on my wedding day it wasn’t for love, but for friendship.
This is Marriage We took our wedding vows and made a promise to live together until death does us part. No one told us how hard it would be those first couple of years. It was the little things that caused frustrations. Like laundry on the floor, who slept on what side of the bed, what kind of toothpaste would we use. Whose house would we go to for the holidays. Everything seemed to cause a struggle. Sometimes those struggles turned to an all out war.
30 Days of Marriage Thankfulness Sharing 30 reasons why I am thankful for my marriage during our "anniversary month" in 2014. It's been 31 years!
30 years What I have learned
30 years What I have learned