There was a time in my life when the words “surrender to God” terrified me. Oh I wanted a life of surrender, living in total obedience to God – but to surrender everything? To surrender my heart, body, and soul to God? that just seemed to big a risk to me.
The word "surrender" is defined as: to yield, give up or over, submit, abandon, relinquish, or waive. In some translations, the word "surrender" is not found, but the concepts of "yielding" (Romans 6:16-19) or submitting (James 4:7) are used instead.
In order to surrender my heart, body, and soul to God, meant that I must be willing to yield to whatever God might have planned for my life.
Well I wasn’t going to yield all my life. God could have parts of it, but I would control those areas that, well that I felt God hadn’t done so good a job in controlling. You know, as if I ever could or would do a better job than God in protecting my life from harm.
You see somewhere along the way I got this idea that things happened in my life that even God had no control over. I thought “if he's so good why didn’t he intervene?" So I would spend many years resisting complete surrender to God.
If I was completely honest, it's that I just didn’t trust him. Oh, I would say that I did, but when it comes to running my life, I’d rather stay in control, even if I was doing a bad job of it.
God was and is so patient with me as I learn to trust Him more and more each day. You see this is a journey of surrender at least for me. Maybe others just surrender their lives one day and it’s done, I don’t know. For me it’s been a long and sometimes painful process of letting go of those areas that I want to control. I get the idea that it will always be a journey of growing and letting go. For as soon as I think I’ve surrender, at least in one area, another area is revealed.
It is easier today than it use to be. In learning to study God’s word for myself I have been able to see the many lies I have believed about God. As I have studied His word I have seen His faithfulness to His children and I have come to understand that He truly is good all the time. He is good to me, He can be trusted and He can work all things together for good.
I still have days where I take over and want to control. I get hurt, I’m abandon, rejected, forgotten or any other painful event and I seem to always resort back to wanting to be in control – not trusting God.
How about you? Do you trust God? Can you allow Him complete control over your life? Can you surrender every area of your life to Him?
Oh God, continually I fail and make a mess of my life. I surrender then take it back and try to run my own life. Forgive me Father, my heart is grieved to know that during those times I hurt you. You want only good for me Father help me to grow in a fuller, deeper understanding of what that means. Father help me to run to you when I don’t understand my painful circumstances instead of pulling away and taking control. Strip away all of me so that I can be filled with all of you. Help me to surrender all my life, for I can not do it on my own. Amen